If you want happiness for a lifetime, help the next generation.
-Chinese proverb-
That is the quote of the week (last week) in my day planner...and I quite like it.
It applies to anyone who wants to find happiness for a lifetime.
The quote was perfect for me today...because I've been thinking a lot about motherhood recently.
Being raised by a loving mother...who loves to be a mother...I've always dreamed of being a mother...and now I am. Being raised LDS added to that special expectation of wanting to being a full time mom and homemaker. Well...I have discovered that motherhood is challenging in ways different than I would have imagined. I only have Azaléia right now to love and teach and care for...and she is really good...and it is time consuming...but in my like to over-schedule everything...I kept finding myself dreaming of getting a PhD and returning to work one day. I am completely supportive of everything Ernesto endeavors professionally because I would love to do the same thing...in another life I guess. It leads me to think that I can do it all...be the awesome mom and get more education/experience professionally. Why? I'm not sure...yet at the same time I have a few ideas why. I don't think about this all day long...just in my moments of weakness where I don't feel like I have been too successful at being a good housewife/mother for the day. Most of the time I really enjoy everything about being with Azaléia, even cleaning/cooking, organizing, planning, resting, taking naps with Azaléia...etc. But...when I feel like a failure...I think about my past...studying and working...and remembering the feeling of success and accomplishment. Maybe in those moments of weakness I feel that "that other life" would validate my self worth more. I know...you are thinking...Leanna...how wrong can you be? Well it was what I was thinking. One night last week...after trying to put Azaléia to bed for over half an hour (mind you I was tired too)...I asked Ernesto to come and finish what wasn't happening with me...then locked myself in the bathroom for a nice long hot bath. When I came out...both Ernesto and Azaléia were asleep...and even though it was nice to relax...I felt so selfish. I wasn't content after having so much time to myself either. So I knew I needed some inspiration on how special it is...to be a mother...a homemaker. I went to lds.org and read some powerful and inspiring talks about motherhood...and my heart changed.
I read a talk "Mothers Who Know" by Sis. Beck...and loved the change of heart I experienced. I had read this talk awhile back...but it was different when I needed to hear it.
It applies to anyone who wants to find happiness for a lifetime.
The quote was perfect for me today...because I've been thinking a lot about motherhood recently.
Being raised by a loving mother...who loves to be a mother...I've always dreamed of being a mother...and now I am. Being raised LDS added to that special expectation of wanting to being a full time mom and homemaker. Well...I have discovered that motherhood is challenging in ways different than I would have imagined. I only have Azaléia right now to love and teach and care for...and she is really good...and it is time consuming...but in my like to over-schedule everything...I kept finding myself dreaming of getting a PhD and returning to work one day. I am completely supportive of everything Ernesto endeavors professionally because I would love to do the same thing...in another life I guess. It leads me to think that I can do it all...be the awesome mom and get more education/experience professionally. Why? I'm not sure...yet at the same time I have a few ideas why. I don't think about this all day long...just in my moments of weakness where I don't feel like I have been too successful at being a good housewife/mother for the day. Most of the time I really enjoy everything about being with Azaléia, even cleaning/cooking, organizing, planning, resting, taking naps with Azaléia...etc. But...when I feel like a failure...I think about my past...studying and working...and remembering the feeling of success and accomplishment. Maybe in those moments of weakness I feel that "that other life" would validate my self worth more. I know...you are thinking...Leanna...how wrong can you be? Well it was what I was thinking. One night last week...after trying to put Azaléia to bed for over half an hour (mind you I was tired too)...I asked Ernesto to come and finish what wasn't happening with me...then locked myself in the bathroom for a nice long hot bath. When I came out...both Ernesto and Azaléia were asleep...and even though it was nice to relax...I felt so selfish. I wasn't content after having so much time to myself either. So I knew I needed some inspiration on how special it is...to be a mother...a homemaker. I went to lds.org and read some powerful and inspiring talks about motherhood...and my heart changed.
I read a talk "Mothers Who Know" by Sis. Beck...and loved the change of heart I experienced. I had read this talk awhile back...but it was different when I needed to hear it.
I feel more inspired to be a better mother...to cherish this opportunity that I have...and to not belittle its importance. I feel that is one way Satan works on me...and on society in general...to tell women that have the choice to stay home and be with their children...that working will make them happier. Most women choose to be outside the home...at times it can be easier...but our Heavenly Father knows best. In His plan...He has taught that "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children."(The Family: A Proclamation to the World)
Sis. Beck taught me how I can be a better nurturer. In the same talk she said...
Sis. Beck taught me how I can be a better nurturer. In the same talk she said...
"Mothers who know are nurturers. This is their special assignment and role under the plan of happiness. 5 To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Therefore, mothers who know create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. Another word for nurturing is homemaking. Homemaking includes cooking, washing clothes and dishes, and keeping an orderly home. Home is where women have the most power and influence; therefore, Latter-day Saint women should be the best homemakers in the world. Working beside children in homemaking tasks creates opportunities to teach and model qualities children should emulate. Nurturing mothers are knowledgeable, but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth. Growth happens best in a “house of order,” and women should pattern their homes after the Lord’s house (see D&C 109). Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work. Helping growth occur through nurturing is truly a powerful and influential role bestowed on women."
I feel different now when I do the dishes again...or do the simple routine things of being a homemaker. I'm also very grateful for a very good husband who thanks me for everything I've done at home.
I am also grateful for blogs...because I love to see how my friends...mostly girlfriends...
magnify that calling of "nurturing"...and you are all such examples to me! Thank you!
I must always remember that "There is eternal influence and power in motherhood." I feel different now when I do the dishes again...or do the simple routine things of being a homemaker. I'm also very grateful for a very good husband who thanks me for everything I've done at home.
I am also grateful for blogs...because I love to see how my friends...mostly girlfriends...
magnify that calling of "nurturing"...and you are all such examples to me! Thank you!
6 comments:
Thank you for this post. I do love being home with my boy so much, but I've found myself thinking a lot of the same things lately... doing more school, work, etc. I have found a few things I can do to improve myself for now while still being home, and some day in the future I can do those others as well. Thanks for the reminder of Sis. Beck's talk. I'll have to go read it again.
I think there are more women like you than you think, including myself. I do love being a mom and would not trade my job for anything, but it is very easy in moments where you feel like you are failing to think that your talents would be better used elsewhere. We ALL do it, because staying home with our kids is extremely hard in ways you never imagined, as you said. And, there will be time for all those things like higher education and work, etc., just not right now maybe. But, you will get your chance, and when you do, your children will be forever grateful for the sacrifice you made in being home with them when they needed it most. I need to go back and re-read Julie Beck's talk also. Thanks for the great post.
"Nurturing mothers are knowledgeable, but all the education women attain will avail them nothing if they do not have the skill to make a home that creates a climate for spiritual growth. Growth happens best in a “house of order,” and women should pattern their homes after the Lord’s house."
This was the best part from that quote you shared. I think you spoke to what MANY moms feel, and I do believe it is Satan who makes us feel we have to be doing so much more, when isn't being a mom a big enough job already? Maybe if I stopped dreaming about getting a masters and doing other things, my house would stay clean and then we'd all be happier because of it! The problem is that homemaking isn't always very "fun." I'm not usually looking forward to mopping the floor, but to go substitute for a 3rd grade class for a day? Of course! So you are right, we need to love what we do at home so our children will love it, too and know how to be homemakers.
You really said it well, Leanna! Thanks for being so honest and making me more motivated, too! You are a great mom. I'm going to read that talk again.
Leanna, you need to save that post and use it for a talk at church. Sissy, I have never regretted being a homemaker and nurturer. I may have regretted not doing all I should and could have done, if I would have listened to the promptings of the Spirit more. That is the only part of mothering that I regret. You young sisters are amazing!! I was able to go back to school and finish what I started. It took 22 years to get a four year degree. But now that all the children are gone, I am grateful to be able to nurture 24 second graders, who need my mothering skills. I'm grateful especially to have raised my amazing children who are able to sacrifice for their children as we sacrificed for ours. Thanks Lovie, love you forever!!
Leannita he leido tantas veces ese diacurso es tan inspirador, me encanta leer lo que escribes y como aprendes cada día a ser mejor madre y esposa, pero especialmente como puedes recibir inspiración personal para tu hogar y tu bella familia, te amo mucho, no sé como hemos podido estar sin tí tantos años, eres una bendición para Ernestito
La mima
ñeannita me encanta lo que ha escrito Barbara, ella s un ejemplo para todas, la amo demasiado como a tí, son un regalo en nuestras vidas,es un regalo d enuestro Padre celestial que nos a unido. Gracias por todo
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